September 18, 2014 by TruthRevolt.org
In this special episode, our intrepid
host, Andrew Klavan, employs a crack team of investigators to determine
if President Obama is correct when he declares that the terror group
ISIS is not, in fact, Islamic. See the video and transcript below.
TRANSCRIPT:
IS ISIS ISLAMIC?
I’m Andrew Klavan and this is the Revolting Truth.
Obama: ISIL is not Islamic.
Today, the Revolting Truth takes on a
hard-hitting investigation, fact checking the President of the United
States himself in order to ask the question: is ISIL Islamic?
To bring you up to date in case you’re a low
information voter or just kind of a doofus, President Barack Obama
recently delivered an address to the nation in which he admitted that
just about everything George W. Bush did in the Middle East was right,
everything Obama himself said about Bush was wrong, and now we had to go
back to war again because, dad gum it, he’d screwed the whole business
up and only just realized his entire worldview was mistaken.
He didn’t actually come out and say that. It was more like subtext.
Anyway bottom line, Obama has declared that
he is leading us from behind back to war with a bombing campaign against
ISIL in Iraq and Syria. This will be very different from our last war
in Iraq — the one George W. Bush won — because there will be no American
boots on the ground and therefore no danger of American deaths or
victory.
Another difference between this war in Iraq
and the one we actually won will be that Obama has assembled a coalition
of 9 allies, instead of going it alone with only 34 allies like Bush
did. Also, he says he’ll be getting our friends in the region to give us
help, like really inexpensive rugs, and maybe one of those souvenir
knives with the curved blades that fit so neatly between the first and
second thoracic vertebrae of the spine.
Which brings us back to the subject of our
hard hitting investigative report — our enemy: a reinvigorated version
of Al Qaeda called ISIL, the Islamic State in Iraq and the Levant or
ISIS, the Islamic State In Iraq and Syria, or IS, the Islamic State or
just a barbaric bunch of Islamic dirtbags… J.A.B.B.O.I.D.
This is the group the president once called
the JV Team of terrorism. “If a jayvee team puts on Lakers uniforms,
that doesn’t make them Kobe Bryant,” the president quipped hilariously,
to which ISIL replied, “If you put on the title of commander in chief,
that doesn’t make you Abraham Lincoln,” and then promptly reversed
George W. Bush’s victory in Iraq and took the country out from under
Obama’s nose… hahaha… ahem…
But during his address, the president offered a new definition of ISIL, when he said the following:
Obama: “ISIL is not Islamic.”
Always determined to get at the revolting
truth, I personally assigned a crack team of seasoned investigators to
find out if the president’s statement is true. Is ISIL Islamic?
Yeah! The I – it stands for Islamic. It’s
like the first letter in their name. I for Islamic. It didn’t actually
take a crack team of investigators. I just looked it up. Sent Shapiro
a bill for the investigators. But it was right there in Wikipedia.
Islamic State. The name is the big clue. Also the fact that they
murder innocent people in service to Allah. Frankly, I don’t know what
the hell the president was talking about.
I’m Andrew Klavan with the Revolting Truth.
Freedom Center pamphlets now available on Kindle: Click here.
Subscribe to Frontpage’s TV show, The Glazov Gang, and LIKE it on Facebook.
No comments:
Post a Comment